By Jackie Hedeman
Class of 2007
Posted Monday, Feb. 6, 2006, The OG, creative writing

My love for Scottish Redheads, as widely publicized by [insert name here]
is equal to my love for [brooding Mr. Darcy]
is more lasting than my infatuation with [works with Russell Crowe a lot]
is more superficial than my observation of [boy who shall remain anonymous]

My love for Scottish Redheads is idealistic, not imaginary
like my love for [slightly amoral swashbuckler]
and [mysterious red flower]
and [flaming boy in flannels]

My love for Scottish Redheads is eternal
and is not affected by [haggis].